Where Do I Fit in My Church?

Becoming part of a church family is one of the greatest blessings of following Jesus. Yet for new believers, it can sometimes feel overwhelming. Where do I belong? How can I serve? What role does God want me to play?

Take heart—God’s Word assures us that He has a purpose for each one of us in His church. “Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it” (1 Corinthians 12:27). Here are five biblical truths to help you prayerfully find your place in His family.

1. Be Comfortable in Who You Are. God created you uniquely and purposefully. Psalm 139:14 reminds us, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” You don’t need to imitate others to fit in—you simply need to rest in who you are in Christ. When you walk confidently in your identity as God’s child, you’ll naturally connect with your church family.

2. Discover Your God-Given Gifts and Talents. The Holy Spirit equips every believer with gifts to build up the church. Romans 12:6 says, “We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us.” Ask the Lord to reveal your gifts and consider how your natural talents may be used for His glory. Whether it’s serving, teaching, encouraging, or showing mercy, your gifts have a place in His plan.

3. Learn from Others Around You. Proverbs 15:22 teaches, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” Seek guidance from pastors, mentors, and trusted believers in your church. They may see strengths and opportunities you’ve overlooked. God often uses the wisdom of others to direct us to the right place of service.

4. Stay Open to Growth and Change. Your place in the church may shift over time as God shapes you. Ecclesiastes 3:1 reminds us, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” Be willing to try new areas of ministry and allow God to stretch you. You may begin in one role and later discover an even deeper passion in another.

5. Pay Attention to Where God is Working. Jesus said, “My Father is always at his work to this very day, and I too am working” (John 5:17). Look around your church. Where is God moving? Where are the needs? Often, your place is found at the intersection of God’s work, your gifts, and the needs of others. Pray for eyes to see and a heart ready to serve.

Closing Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You for placing me in Your family, the church. Help me to rest in who You made me to be. Reveal the gifts You’ve given me and show me where to use them for Your glory. Surround me with wise counsel, keep my heart open to new opportunities, and give me eyes to see where You are working. May my life bless others and bring honor to Christ, in whose name I pray. Amen.

Deacon Ministry Handbook

The office of deacon is still relevant and Biblical in the 21st century. Although there has been an increased emphasis on the office of elder in the local Baptist congregation, most Baptist churches still need and honor the office of deacon.

When I consider my years in the pastorate, I think of the men with whom the Lord surrounded me. God placed men in the office of deacon who encouraged me, challenged me, advised me, and prayed for me. These men were partners in the ministry of the Gospel, they were brothers in Christ, and they were friends. I cherish them and count it a special privilege to have served with them and to have personally served as a deacon early in life.

Many good deacon resources exist, but few are recent and updated. The authors of this resource work regularly with deacons and they believe that deacons play a crucial role in the success of the local pastor and church. They wrote the Deacon Ministry Handbook to provide concise, practical guidance to pastors and deacons. The combined ministry knowledge of the authors has produced a tool that can benefit every pastor and deacon in Kentucky and across the Southern Baptist Convention.

You can get a copy at any place books are sold, but you can purchase at a discounted rate from this LifeWay site designed to feature the book. The authors and I recently recorded supplemental video resources that will be available soon to assist with training. If we can assist your church or association with deacon training, please email me at steve.rice@kybaptist.org.

4 Steps to Forgiving Those I Hate

How can we forgive people we hate? How can we show grace to those we can’t stomach? The honest truth is that we can’t! In our own strength, we are unable to forgive those who have hurt us deeply, but with God’s help, it is possible.

4 Steps to Forgiving Those I Hate

1. Turn our hurts over to God. We should remind ourselves that nothing happens that God does not allow. As a result we should acknowledge our hurts and ask God to help us with them. He may choose to teach us through them and shape us into the person He wants us to be. God never wastes a hurt!

God never wastes a hurt!

2. Ask God to transform our hate to love. In time, God will change our hearts to match His heart if we allow Him to do so. We should pray and ask God to start the process of healing and forgiveness in our hearts.

3. Read what God’s Word says about forgiveness. The Bible is replete with verses on this topic. Reading what God says is a major part of how He moves us towards a heart of forgiveness. Here are a couple of passages on the topic:

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”  Matthew 18:21-22 (NIV) 

“He said to them, ‘When you pray, say:  Father, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come. Give us each day our daily bread. Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us. And lead us not into temptation.'”  Luke 11:2-4 (NIV) 

4. Remember that we sinned against God. God forgave us when we didn’t deserve it, so we should forgive others when they don’t deserve it. We are never more like God than when we grant forgiveness to undeserving people.

Don’t spend the rest of your life without rest in your life!

If you’re struggling with hard feelings toward someone . . . if you’re mad, hurt, bitter, or all the above rolled into one, then let it go! Forgive! Do it for their sake! Do it for your sake! Do it for the Lord! Don’t spend the rest of your life without rest in your life. Unforgiveness can slow down or even sidetrack your spiritual growth.

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6 Reasons I Like Deacons

I have served “as” a deacon and I have served “with” deacons. As a pastor I appreciated the office of deacon and the men who served in that role. Here are a few of the reasons I really like deacons:

6 Reasons I Like Deacons

1. Deacons are fellow servants. As a pastor, I was a servant of the Lord and a servant of the church. According to Acts 6, my main role as a pastor was to serve the church through preaching/teaching and prayer. Likewise, deacons are servants of the Lord and servants of the church.

2. Deacons are fellow men. I know there are exceptions where women serve as deacons, but in all the churches where I served as pastor, the deacons were all men. Men need to be around other men. We need the accountability and the example. Serving with men of God who were deacons helped to keep me on track in my spiritual walk and discipleship path. As Scripture says, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17, ESV).

Men need to be around other men.

3. Deacons are human. Even though pastors hold an important office and are held to high standards according to 1 Timothy 3, they are not perfect. They make mistakes just like everyone else. Deacons are held to the same high standards and qualifications as pastors, but they are human also.

4. Deacons are leaders. Most churches are desperate for leadership–especially servant leadership. Deacons, along with pastors, are uniquely positioned to provide much-needed servant leadership modeled after Jesus’ example in John 13.

5. Deacons are partners. Jim Henry, longtime pastor of FBC Orlando, referred to his deacons as “partners in ministry.” That is the perfect title for a deacon. No pastor or staff can carry out all the ministry needed in a local church. We need to partner together to serve God’s church.

…deacons are partners in ministry.

6. Deacons are friends. Some of my closest friends have been deacons with whom I have been privileged to serve.

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Influence and Impact

Leaders want to have influence and make an impact!

Almost everyone wants their life to count! It is Scriptural to want to have influence and make an impact for the Lord! The Apostle Peter understood that, so he wrote about it in his letter to the believers in northern Asia Minor.  Some of them were present in Jerusalem on the Day of Pentecost and heard Peter preach, but now they were suffering greatly from intense persecution.  In his letter, he encourages them to continue impacting others for the Lord during days of great difficulty.

3 Ways to Have Influence and Make An Impact

1.  Start serving.  “To the elders among you, I [Peter] appeal as a fellow elder, a witness of Christ’s sufferings and one who also will share in the glory to be revealed:  Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be….” (1 Peter 5:1-2a).  Peter saw Jesus serve others through suffering.  When we take our eyes off our own struggles and focus on others, we imitate Jesus and we make an impact.

2.  Be humble.  “Young men, in the same way be submissive to those who are older. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble'”  (1 Peter 5:5).  Surely Peter had the Upper Room towel and basin scene in mind as he wrote these words.  God uses those with a humble heart and He gives them grace.  I have noticed that all my “heroes” in the faith are men and women marked by humility.  Most Christians admire and respect those who have a humble spirit.

…all my “heroes” in the faith are men and women marked by humility.

3.  Trust God.  “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).  God is in control.  Even when we cannot see or sense Him, He is there.  Not only is He there, He CARES!  HE is the key!  Knowing He is in control during difficult moments should free us to focus on others and to continue to faithfully serve Him.