Churches Can Be Happy, Happy, Happy

Duck Dynasty

Every time I watch Duck Dynasty I go away with a smile.  I’m encouraged, challenged, and sometimes emotionally moved.  In short, I go away happy, happy, happy.  Why can’t our churches be that way?  If our Baptist churches were a little more happy, I suspect that 75% of them wouldn’t be declining or on a long plateau.

Now, don’t misunderstand, I’m not talking about the heresy of prosperity theology that is expounded from so many mega pulpits today.  I’m simply talking about preaching the truth of the Bible in love and in the joy of the Lord.  Biblically, the Greek word for joy is the word chara.  The word occurs 59 times in the Word of God and is generally translated “joy” throughout.  Joy is not something that is derived from the world; joy comes from Jesus.

In a post at Thomrainer.com, Dr. Thom S. Rainer shared Nine Traits of Happy Churches.  Here’s Dr. Rainer’s list:

  1. The pastor was a strong leader, but not an autocratic leader. He was able to maintain that healthy balance of providing clarity of vision without imposing his will on every decision.
  2. The pastor regularly demonstrated and affirmed love for the congregation. In both his actions and his words, the pastor communicated clearly that he loved the members of the church. And he loved them regardless of their apparent feelings toward him, though most of the members genuinely loved the pastor as well.
  3. The pastor regularly demonstrated and affirmed love for the community where the church was located. Though he could not be omnipresent, the pastor made it a point to be involved in many of the affairs of the community. He genuinely loved people in the community and viewed the entire area as his mission field.
  4. The ministry staff liked each other, and they worked well together. If there are tensions among the staff, they cannot be hidden from the congregation. But if the staff is unified and banter in fun with one another, the members feed off that joy and unity.
  5. A high proportion of the membership was actively involved in ministry. When church members are doing the work of ministry, they have a sense of fulfillment and joy. When they aren’t, they often have extra time on their hands to be divisive.
  6. Business meetings were brief and friendly. These meetings were rarely a time of infighting and complaining. To the contrary, most of the members were too busy doing ministry to be negative (see #5).
  7. A high proportion of the members were in a small group or Sunday school class. Community grew in these small groups. People who are true members of a community tend to be happier people.
  8. The pastor’s time in the Word was protected. It is easy for a pastor to yield his time in the Word for the tyranny of the urgent. Thus he becomes frustrated, as he has to rush to complete a sermon, or as he does not have sufficient time to do the sermon well. The members likewise become frustrated because they don’t feel like the pastor is feeding them. A happy church makes certain that the pastor has adequate time every week to be in the Word.
  9. The pastor had a small informal or formal group to whom he was accountable. This group includes those members who clearly love the pastor. They offer both encouragement and accountability for him. The interchange between this group and the pastor is frank, transparent and, overall, healthy. And all communications take place on an unmistakable foundation of love.

If churches truly want to experience revitalization, this list should be reviewed from time to time.  Keep in mind, this IS NOT a formula for church revitalization, but let’s be honest, it sure couldn’t hurt!  People are much more likely to “tune in” to a church that is happy, happy, happy!

The Practice of “Slowing”

One of the great books on spiritual disciplines is John Ortberg’s book, The Life You’ve Always Wanted:  Spiritual Disciplines for Ordinary People. You can read my review of the book by clicking here.

One of the spiritual disciplines he talks about in the book is the practice of “slowing.” Have you ever thought about “slowing” as a spiritual practice? One of his mentors told him that if he wanted to grow spiritually that he must ruthlessly eliminate hurry from his life. Listen to a great quote from his book:

Hurry is the great enemy of spiritual life in our day. Hurry can destroy our souls. Hurry can keep us from living well….Again and again, as we pursue spiritual life, we must do battle with hurry. For many of us the great danger is not that we renounce our faith. It is that we will become so distracted and rushed and preoccupied that we will settle for a mediocre version of it. We will just skim our lives instead of actually living them.

Most of us battle the hurry sickness, but how can we treat it–how can we cure it? There are two main practices that can help us swim against our culture’s current of hurry.

1.  Slowing. Slowing involves cultivating patience by deliberately choosing to place ourselves in positions where we simply have to wait. Slowing will seem like such a “waste of time,” but it is invaluable. Here are some examples. Deliberately drive in the slow lane.  Chew your food slowly. Get in the longest check-out line at the grocery store. Go through an entire week without wearing a watch. Read each sentence slowly–then read it again even more slowly.

2.  Solitude. Solitude is a more traditional spiritual practice. I’m not saying that we should take it to the extreme and join a monastery. I’m just saying that solitude is the one place where we can gain freedom from the forces of society that will otherwise relentlessly mold us. When we’re “alone” with God–He molds us!

We need some small measures of solitude every day. A walk, a short drive, working in the yard, sitting in the car before going into the office, a quiet time–all these serve as moments of solitude. On occasion, we need longer periods of solitude. Take an afternoon to yourself or even an entire day. Go to a place where you will be uninterrupted and alone. Spend the day relaxing, reading, walking, napping, etc.

Both of these practices have been vital to my spiritual growth and to my ability to hear from God. By the way, if you haven’t read John Ortberg’s book on spiritual disciplines, you must do so. Here’s a link to Amazon where you can purchase the book and get started. I wish I had read this book as a new Christian and learned about the practice of “slowing” and many of the other spiritual disciplines that have helped me to grow in recent years.

Leadership: Image vs. Integrity

The real test of any leader is in their private life. Image is what people think we are; integrity is what we really are! Leaders need to be people of integrity—honest, genuine, consistent, and transparent. In particular, spiritual leaders need to have strong spiritual disciplines in the areas of Bible study, prayer, and church attendance.

Leaders need to carefully guard their time. Elton Trueblood wrote:

A public man, though he is necessarily available at many times, must learn to hide. If he is always available, he is not worth enough when he is available.

Gordon MacDonald asked one of the most profound questions a leader must face, “Are we going to order our inner worlds so that they will create influence on the outer world? Or will we neglect our private worlds and thus permit the outer sphere to shape us?” This is the choice we have to make every day of our lives. That’s what Paul seemed to say in Romans 12:2.

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this [outer] world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Romans 12:2 (NIV)

“Don’t let the world squeeze you into its mold.” Romans 12:2 (Phillips)

If the real test of a spiritual leader is their private life, then how are you doing? Are you holding down a passing grade? If not, ask God to help you make improvement.

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4 Steps to Forgiving Those I Hate

How can we forgive people we hate? How can we show grace to those we can’t stomach? The honest truth is that we can’t! In our own strength, we are unable to forgive those who have hurt us deeply, but with God’s help, it is possible.

4 Steps to Forgiving Those I Hate

1. Turn our hurts over to God. We should remind ourselves that nothing happens that God does not allow. As a result we should acknowledge our hurts and ask God to help us with them. He may choose to teach us through them and shape us into the person He wants us to be. God never wastes a hurt!

God never wastes a hurt!

2. Ask God to transform our hate to love. In time, God will change our hearts to match His heart if we allow Him to do so. We should pray and ask God to start the process of healing and forgiveness in our hearts.

3. Read what God’s Word says about forgiveness. The Bible is replete with verses on this topic. Reading what God says is a major part of how He moves us towards a heart of forgiveness. Here are a couple of passages on the topic:

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”  Matthew 18:21-22 (NIV) 

“He said to them, ‘When you pray, say:  Father, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come. Give us each day our daily bread. Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us. And lead us not into temptation.'”  Luke 11:2-4 (NIV) 

4. Remember that we sinned against God. God forgave us when we didn’t deserve it, so we should forgive others when they don’t deserve it. We are never more like God than when we grant forgiveness to undeserving people.

Don’t spend the rest of your life without rest in your life!

If you’re struggling with hard feelings toward someone . . . if you’re mad, hurt, bitter, or all the above rolled into one, then let it go! Forgive! Do it for their sake! Do it for your sake! Do it for the Lord! Don’t spend the rest of your life without rest in your life. Unforgiveness can slow down or even sidetrack your spiritual growth.

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Influence and Impact

Leaders want to have influence and make an impact!

Almost everyone wants their life to count! It is Scriptural to want to have influence and make an impact for the Lord! The Apostle Peter understood that, so he wrote about it in his letter to the believers in northern Asia Minor.  Some of them were present in Jerusalem on the Day of Pentecost and heard Peter preach, but now they were suffering greatly from intense persecution.  In his letter, he encourages them to continue impacting others for the Lord during days of great difficulty.

3 Ways to Have Influence and Make An Impact

1.  Start serving.  To the elders among you, I [Peter] appeal as a fellow elder, a witness of Christ’s sufferings and one who also will share in the glory to be revealed:  Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be….” (1 Peter 5:1-2a).  Peter saw Jesus serve others through suffering.  When we take our eyes off our own struggles and focus on others, we imitate Jesus and we make an impact.

2.  Be humble.  “Young men, in the same way be submissive to those who are older. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble'”  (1 Peter 5:5).  Surely Peter had the Upper Room towel and basin scene in mind as he wrote these words.  God uses those with a humble heart and He gives them grace.  I have noticed that all my “heroes” in the faith are men and women marked by humility.  Most Christians admire and respect those who have a humble spirit.

…all my “heroes” in the faith are men and women marked by humility.

3.  Trust God.  “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).  God is in control.  Even when we cannot see or sense Him, He is there.  Not only is He there, He CARES!  HE is the key!  Knowing He is in control during difficult moments should free us to focus on others and to continue to faithfully serve Him.