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6 Reasons I Like Deacons

Posted in Church Chat, Church Consulting, Church Revitalization, Deacon, Leadership, Uncategorized, WorshipLeave a comment

I have served “as” a deacon and I have served “with” deacons. As a pastor I appreciated the office of deacon and the men who served in that role. Here are a few of the reasons I really like deacons:

6 Reasons I Like Deacons

1. Deacons are fellow servants. As a pastor, I was a servant of the Lord and a servant of the church. According to Acts 6, my main role as a pastor was to serve the church through preaching/teaching and prayer. Likewise, deacons are servants of the Lord and servants of the church.

2. Deacons are fellow men. I know there are exceptions where women serve as deacons, but in all the churches where I served as pastor, the deacons were all men. Men need to be around other men. We need the accountability and the example. Serving with men of God who were deacons helped to keep me on track in my spiritual walk and discipleship path. As Scripture says, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17, ESV).

Men need to be around other men.

3. Deacons are human. Even though pastors hold an important office and are held to high standards according to 1 Timothy 3, they are not perfect. They make mistakes just like everyone else. Deacons are held to the same high standards and qualifications as pastors, but they are human also.

4. Deacons are leaders. Most churches are desperate for leadership–especially servant leadership. Deacons, along with pastors, are uniquely positioned to provide much-needed servant leadership modeled after Jesus’ example in John 13.

5. Deacons are partners. Jim Henry, longtime pastor of FBC Orlando, referred to his deacons as “partners in ministry.” That is the perfect title for a deacon. No pastor or staff can carry out all the ministry needed in a local church. We need to partner together to serve God’s church.

…deacons are partners in ministry.

6. Deacons are friends. Some of my closest friends have been deacons with whom I have been privileged to serve.

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3 Ways to Resolve Conflict

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Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation. 2 Corinthians 5:18 (NKJV)

According to Scripture, Christians are called to a higher standard when it comes resolving conflict. Because we are reconciled to God through Christ, God requires every Christian to serve in the ministry of reconciliation. It is not optional and it is not up for discussion.

In my role I often talk to pastors and churches who are experiencing varying levels of conflict. The key to resolving conflict is to catch it early, in its infancy. A camp fire is much easier to extinguish than an inferno. This is especially true when it comes to conflict.

A camp fire is much easier to extinguish than an inferno!

Peacemaker Ministries has produced a number of good resources in this area. In their pamphlet Peacemaking Principles, they offer the following three biblical ways to resolve conflict early when it is still personal and private:

3 Way to Resolve Conflict

1.  Overlook an offense. Many disputes are so insignificant that they should be resolved by quietly overlooking an offense. “A man’s wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense” (Proverbs 19:11). Overlooking an offense is a form of forgiveness, and involves a deliberate decision not to talk about it, dwell on it, or let it grow into pent-up bitterness or anger.

2.  Reconciliation. If an offense is too serious to overlook or has damaged our relationship, we need to resolve personal or relational issues through confession, loving correction, and forgiveness. “If your brother has something against you…go and be reconciled” (Matthew 5:23-24). “Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently” (Galatians 6:1). “Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13).

3.  Negotiation. Even if we successfully resolve relational issues, we may still need to work through material issues related to money, property, or other rights. This should be done through a cooperative bargaining process in which you and the other person seek to reach a settlement that satisfies the legitimate needs of each side. “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4).

I have not always known or practiced these principles in my personal life or in my ministry, but I am now committed to do so. May we all seek to live by the Apostle Paul’s charge to the Christians in the church at Rome.

If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Romans 12:18

5 Things I Hated Doing as a Pastor

Posted in Church Chat, Church Consulting, Church Revitalization, Discipleship, Funny, Life Happens, Ministry, Preaching, UncategorizedLeave a comment

In similar posts I wrote about 6 Things I Hated Hearing as a Pastor followed by 7 Things I Loved Hearing as a Pastor. In today’s post I want to explore 5 Things I Hated DOING as a Pastor. Keep in mind that I loved being a pastor and I loved most the tasks that came along with the position, but I didn’t love everything.

5 Things I Hated Doing as a Pastor

1. Preaching on difficult topics. I preached on marriage, divorce, homosexuality, fornication, adultery, abortion, tithing, racism, prejudice, laziness, gossip, and numerous other difficult subjects, but I didn’t love doing it. As a pastor, I preferred to preach about Jesus and the encouraging passages that abound, but I knew that I was accountable to God to preach the whole Bible even when the topics were not popular or culturally acceptable.

…even when the topics were not popular or culturally acceptable.”

2. Visiting new parents in the hospital. I didn’t really hate visiting new parents, but it always felt a little awkward. I felt better visiting when the mother and the father were both present or when my wife could join me. As their pastor, I wanted to let them know that we celebrated with them on the birth of their child, but at the same time, I wanted to respect their need for privacy. As a man, I was certain that I didn’t understand everything that the new mother was going through physically and emotionally, so I wanted to give her space for rest and healing.

3. Addressing church conflict. When I faced conflict during my early years of ministry I simply prayed and hoped that it would go away. As the pastor, I began to realize that I had to lean into conflict and work towards reconciliation, but it was something that I always dreaded.

…I began to realize that I had to lean into conflict…”

4. Asking for help. In the perfect church world, all the church members would jump in and volunteer when needed. Since that rarely happened, I often had to personally ask people for help.

5. Administering church discipline. The Bible clearly teaches that there are times when church discipline is required. The purpose of discipline is to help the offender discover his sin and his need for repentance. Even when church discipline was appropriate and best, it was always very difficult.

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Baby Steps (Revitalization Series)

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When do you prepare your home nursery? Before the baby comes or after the baby comes? Practically everyone prepares the nursery BEFORE the baby comes. Many struggling churches have no young parents attending, so the nursery sits unused. That is actually the perfect time to update the nursery facilities. If you wait until a young family visits, then it’s too late! Their baby arrives and you’re not ready!

Ingredients of a Great Church Nursery

  1. Clean. The nursery MUST be clean. Parents are already reluctant to leave their precious child behind while they attend worship–they certainly will not do so if the nursery is not clean. That means the nursery must not only look clean, it must smell clean. Many churches need to pull up old carpet and replace it with a surface that is easy to keep clean.
  2. Safe. The nursery MUST be safe. Churches should have a secure check-in system for every child even if there are only 1 or 2 attending. Parents will spread the word to others that the church gives priority to safety and security. Workers should be carefully vetted with background checks and other safety measures. There should always be at least two workers in the nursery at all times.
  3. Proximity. If possible, the nursery should be close to the place where the parents attend worship. Parents will feel more comfortable leaving their baby in the nursery if the sanctuary is nearby. Many churches use a texting app to communicate with parents if they need to be reached during the worship service.
  4. Modern. Modern does not have to be expensive; it simply has to be up-to-date. Modernizing the nursery can often be accomplished with flooring, furnishings, paint, and lighting. The space should be bright and cozy. When thinking about the décor, parents want it to feel like their nursery at home.
  5. Supplied. The nursery should be well-supplied with safe furniture, a diaper-changing station, handwashing supplies, age-appropriate toys, and parent-approved snacks.
  6. Staff. Put your BEST people in the nursery. Recruit people who love children and love Jesus. Provide training so they are able to serve with excellence. The Kentucky Baptist Convention can provide training.

For more information about church revitalization, the KBC has written Lead to Revitalize: 15 Practices of a Revitalization Leader. Feel free to contact me directly at steve.rice@kybaptist.org if you have questions or need assistance.

Be Prepared

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We are taking the lead at the Kentucky Baptist Convention in addressing the issue of church sexual abuse. The KBC has partnered with an organization called MinistrySafe to provide training sessions we are calling “Church Prepared: Sexual Abuse Prevention, Response, and Care.”

I encourage every pastor and church to be involved. The training will especially benefit the following:

  • Pastors
  • Other Church staff
  • Security Team members
  • Deacons
  • Elders
  • Children’s Workers
  • Student Workers
  • Sunday School Workers
  • Women’s Ministry
  • Men’s Ministry

The training sessions will be held at four locations across the state October 3-6, 2022. The schedule is as follows:

October 3 – Lone Oak First Baptist Church, Paducah

October 4 – Living Hope BC, Bowling Green

October 5 – Buck Run BC, Frankfort

October 6 – Fairview BC, Ashland

Registration
Here is the link to the registration page: https://www.kybaptist.org/churchprepared/. Please let me know if you have any questions or need more information.